18th May 2017

An amusing flight of fancy: It was a particularly stormy and miserable night, the sort where even ducks tuck their heads deep under their wings to escape the unpleasantness. The RV rocked and shook with the increasing gusts of rain-laden air. Jamie stirred for the third time and pushed open the sliding door of the camper van, which had been home and sanctuary for the last two weeks, but not tonight. Answering the call of nature once again, he rendezvoused with Pirelli, the newfound love of his life, but on this occasion, there would be no return to the comfort and warmth of pillow and duvet.

Tall, handsome, with determined, chiselled features, his father woke from a peaceful sleep. When the elements were howling outside, that’s when this man of the British Civil Service (Education Dept.) slept his deepest. Noticing no quilted form slumbering peacefully in the bunk above, the first flicker of concern crossed his usually confident face. Had those in black shirts and ferns slipped in during the night and made good on their promise to continue their world domination? If so, this had now become personal. The lion had been awakened and would roar. KIWI (Korporation for Insidious and Wicked Incidents) would regret the day they decided to cross Jacque Preacher!

I think I’ve been reading too many Lee Child novels. Sitting in an airport lounge with time to kill does tend to make the mind wander, and probably a bit too much in this case. The above script is a true account of our last night in NZ, with a few exceptions that I’m sure are obvious.

With little sleep, we woke at 6 am, showered, packed, and had breakfast by 7 am. It was still blowing a gale, and the rain was torrential when we set off to drop off the RV. Rush hour traffic in Auckland is no laughing matter; the 17.5km journey took us an hour and fifty minutes! Upon arrival, the van was checked and passed with flying colours. I even received a refund as we hadn’t used any gas. The downside, however, was that both Jamie and I had gained a little weight from fast-food grazing. Two coffees later, we were on board the complimentary shuttle bus, heading to the airport.

We wasted another couple of hours (more grazing) while we waited for the check-in desk to open. With passport control and security negotiated without mishap, we set about wasting even more time waiting for the departure gate to be displayed. We spent our last NZ coins on a final bit of grazing.

The flight left on time, and once again, we were fortunate enough to grab a bank of three seats each, allowing us to get quite a bit of sleep. I think out of the 17.5 hours, I managed nearly 10 hours, while Jamie, less so, worked his way through the entire Star Wars series (I didn’t realise there were so many!).

Transit through Doha was smooth, and on time, we flew another 7 hours to Heathrow. The food was good and plentiful on both flights. There was no drama with our rucksacks, and they appeared on the belt quite quickly. After exiting the terminal, we found our shuttle stop to the car park, and the bus arrived immediately. The car was waiting for us, well done, Purple Parking.

The motorway traffic up to Harborough was considerably lighter than on the way down, and we experienced no delays. Upon arriving home, Jamie went to check on Maddy (the rabbit), and Sue started loading the washing machine. It was a great road trip full of adventure and surprises, but it’s also lovely to be home and able to give both mind and body a rest from all the activities. That first cup of home-brewed coffee was the trigger for switching to relax mode. Well, at least until tomorrow, when it’s back to chores again.